We’ve all made choices we regret. Whether now or down the line, these choices have an effect on us. Growing up, we’re bound to make a few wrong turns and that’s normal. Some of these decisions affect not just us but other people which might make it harder to forgive ourselves. But it shouldn’t.
Today’s entry is all about being able to leave the past in the past. Whether it’s overlooking a past mistake or completely leaving it all behind, If you’re someone struggling to forgive yourself, you’re not alone. We’ve all fallen short in one way or another, which is totally okay. Being able to forgive yourself while acknowledging you did wrong is an important skill in self development.
If that’s something you’re interested in or you’re just reading for fun, this post if for you.
Forgiving Others But Yourself
Forgiveness isnβt easyβespecially when it comes to forgiving yourself. Self-forgiveness is about coming to terms with the fact that weβre all human and bound to make mistakes at some point in life. Realizing that no one is perfect and that mistakes are expected is one of the key steps toward becoming a better individual.
Yes, some mistakes are avoidable, but some arenβt. We all mess up at some point. Iβve made mistakes I wish I could erase, a lot of them, actually. But as I grew older, Iβve come to realize that not all mistakes are meant to punish us. Some are meant to teach us valuable lessons, lessons we might not have learned otherwise. And in that sense, mistakes arenβt always setbacks; sometimes, theyβre stepping stones. So why do we feel guilty when it comes to forgiving ourselves but not others?
If I’m being completely honest with myself, most of the time, my guilt comes from a place of self doubt or insecurity. “Why did I even do that, what’s wrong with me?”. This shouldn’t be the case. However, I often find myself spiraling into a state of discomfort. Some days, I can’t even look at myself in the mirror without remembering past events that haunt me. Things happen. So why can’t I just move on?
The truth is, holding on to guilt only weighs us down. The more we replay our regrets in our minds, the harder it becomes to move forward. Self-forgiveness doesnβt mean forgetting what happened or pretending it didnβt matter, it means accepting that the past cannot be changed and choosing to grow from it instead.
Steps to Forgiveness:
Here are some ways I remind myself I’m only human:
- Acknowledging my mistake: “Yeah, this wasn’t my proudest moment, I should’ve known better.”
- Learn the lesson: “Shouldn’t have done that. At least I know better now.”
- Be kind to yourself: “You made a mistake. It’s not the end of the world.”
- Move forward: “Alright, let’s move on with the day!.”
The saying: Treat others the way you would want others to treat you goes both ways. Whether it’s saying a few kind words to yourself in the morning or doing something you love, we should make sure we aren’t holding ourselves back because of a mistake that doesn’t define us.
It’s easy to forgive others for their slip-ups so why can’t we extend that graceful hand towards ourselves? Self forgiveness is a steady process but with time and a lot of effort it can be one of the most freeing, and rewarding decisions you can ever make.
So, stop beating yourself over a mistake you’ve made , even if you just made the mistake. It’s all a part of the process of becoming a better person.
Here’s a video on Self-forgiveness I enjoyed personally, hopefully it helps.